Yesterday in church I had a big fat cry-fest (why does church always bring out the tears?). A storm was churning inside my soul- confusion, frustration and anger over some important decisions that have to be made soon. Decisions that will reverberate inside my heart and mind for the rest of my life, and I so desperately want to make the right choice.
Then in the early evening I walked across the street to the school for an emergency PTA meeting. The neighborhood is up in arms over a redistricting proposal that would break off a big chunk of our community and send them to a different school. I wasn't sure how I felt- we would not be affected directly, but the chunk in question happens to be very wealthy and very generous to our school. In the end I signed the petition, and am hoping, more for the sake of the cohesiveness of the community than anything else, that the proposal doesn't go through. We live in one of the only areas in the city that is a designated national historic district, so it seems a shame to divide it. And okay, I kind of like the privately funded art and science teachers paid for by other people's donations.
As I walked home I could feel the air heavy with the approach of another kind of storm- the ice and snow kind. Sure enough, we're ankle deep in it this evening. I'm anticipating no school for the rest of the week, since temperatures are supposed to stay low, and I'm pretty sure the city of Atlanta doesn't even own snow plows.
Amazingly, amidst all this, I stumbled into several hours of quiet this afternoon while Marley napped, Eric worked in the spare room and the boys went to the neighbors' to play. I pondered, planned and prayed, and as I did I felt the storm inside me calm.
Tonight I'm awash in feelings of clarity, gratitude and peace. We are warm and have everything we need: each other and a Heavenly Father who loves us and answers our prayers, even if sometimes the answers come on the wings of a cold, snow-filled wind.
* Last night I was looking through pictures, trying to calm my mind, when I saw the one above of Mount Ranier, taken when we first moved to Seattle.
3 comments:
Actually the city of Atlanta owns 8 snowplows. Which is kind of funny! (I read it on the internet this morning...)
And I'm glad you're feeling better. I am continually amazed at the fact that Heavenly Father listens and calms my heart, even when the things going on inside it are petty or irrational or otherwise seemingly unworthy of His time or attention!
I hope both storms pass with renewal and calm . . .
Your wonderful photo of Mt. Ranier is a potential cover for a book entiled:
"Looking From a Window Above."
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