Church was kind of rough today. Every time I turned a corner I saw a face I'll miss. I sat on the floor in nursery during Sunday School while Marley cried and clung to me. My phone rang once and I leaped up to answer it, with the hope of seeing 'central showings' in the caller ID. No luck.
We came home and ate bruschetta with sparkling grape juice by candle light while dark clouds and thunder rolled in. Change flickered in the shadows as we talked and laughed shooed the dog away from the table.
After dinner I sat on the sofa with a marker and a pile of school supplies. Year-round school starts tomorrow here, and the boys decided they wanted to go for the two-and-a-half weeks before we move. I'm sure this will only make it harder to leave, but somehow it feels like the right thing to do.
Eric put the baby to bed and read James and the Giant Peach to the boys while I swept the dog hair from the kitchen floor and wiped the counters. Put everything in its place. Straightened the lamp shades, set out the lunchboxes.
I thought about the coming changes. I thought of Eustice and his dragon skin. And how this is the one chance I have to live a mortal life and learn all that I can from its challenges and trials. If I could choose between an easy path without growth and one that will test and stretch and prod me, I know which one I would pick.
And anyway, I don't get to choose do I?
9 comments:
Change is killer for me too. The imagery and sybolism of Eustice is one of my favorites. Props to you for using this uncomfortable time of change to become better. You guys will be great in Atlanta, but we sure will miss you here!
You actually did choose Katie...a long time ago...and we just don't remember. I always had a had time moving...that is what I blame my being a packrat on...if I had to change everything--home/friends/place at least I will still have all my same things in my room that I could come home to. Good luck, you can do it and I'm sure in the end you will grow some roots there too. I figure I have roots in a lot of places..and you will too! btw...I remember vaguly Eustice and his dragon skin...what story is that? can you tell me on my blog? thanks! Good luck packing (that is what I REALLY don't like!)
I am so with you on pulling up those roots. Keep hanging in there!
*sigh* when you and Eric and Marley were in Choir yesterday, I had to not think about the fact that this would be the Last time I'd get to have your help in that way. I LOVE that you have a picture of little Eric in front of the "wall." I'll do my best not to make your parting more difficult by bawling in front of you at any given moment, but no promises, K? ;)
Change is hard, though for good as you say. Moving away to college was about the most traumatic thing I've ever done. Since then it hasn't been moving that has been the biggest challenge for me, so much as changes/adjustments in our family. I wish I could be there to help you. I'm one of those strange people who don't hate packing!
Sad, sad, sad!
I can only imagine how hard it will be for you to leave Durham. Besides the Alders and the Rays, no one we knew there will be there anymore. Good luck!! Lots of hugs to Lindsay too!
Moving is never fun. It gets better once the moving part is over, as you already know.
I actually love the melancholy feeling of this post. I'll echo Elise--hang in there.
I'm pretty sure it goes against every one of our instincts as the mother/wife to pull up roots. I feel like my main job is a mom create emotional stability and it seems impossible to that without sinking those roots deeper.
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